Show Notes

Episode 201: Relinquishing Control (Redux)

Shannon and Janine were so tired from celebrating our 200th anniversary last week we decided to take a week off and re-run an episode from June 2021. Enjoy!

It can be so frustrating when you don’t have control over things in your life. This week Shannon and Janine discuss relinquishing your desire for control over things you can’t control. It’s a recipe for living with more satisfaction and less frustration.

Discussion topics include:

  • The frustration we can feel about not having control over things
  • Focusing on the things we do have control over
  • The feeling of control over our money that YNAB gives us
  • How feeling you’re not in control can be particularly difficult for people who struggle with perfectionism
  • One particular frustration: Lack of control over other people’s behavior or responses
  • What you actually have control over: How you react to other people’s behavior or responses
  • Negotiating tricky spousal issues, particularly in relationships between perfectionists and non-perfectionists
  • How this is really about relinquishing your desire for control
  • Shannon’s experience building a house and how relinquishing her desire for control over everything allowed her to get the project done
  • The utility of deciding upfront that she would not micromanage the project
  • The mechanism Shannon used to make all the house-building decisions easier
  • Letting go of control when you’re delegating tasks
  • The value of knowing why your outcome is important to help you pinpoint those things you don’t need to control
  • Happy third anniversary to the podcast!
  • Communicating clearly to try to get the response you want



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